Lost Faith….

They say FAITH is something which is integral part of life. But sometimes; the same Life convinces us not believe, not to have faith on someone by showing its true colors. It has been a very very long time since I have written something. There were many instances where I just wanted a pen and paper so that I can put everything that was on my mind in the form of words. But every time, something within me, stopped me from doing so. But, now, here I am; finally gathering all my courage, to pen down everything.

Last few months have been really hard for me. There were a lot of ups and down, many emotional breakdowns and some happy moments also. Life was tough, but my phone back cover was there for me to motivate me. There are these words written on it in big block letters:-

When Life’s TOUGH, Remember you are TOUGHER…

Whenever I was about to give up, these words gave me some hope to hang in there… But, I guess they were not enough… At every step, there was something to learn. Every thing that made it more tougher, a part of me broke every time. But I was all patient; waiting for the black clouds to clear because I was optimistic. I knew that my sun is just about to rise… But, now I think, there is a limit of every positivity that one can hold. Sometimes, all just breaks down. My life has always been dynamic. There is always something going on, and I liked it that way. Otherwise, all just become boring and dull. I am okay if there are sad moments as it adds spice to life; makes it more interesting. And when it gets boring sometime, I myself add spice to it 🙂 But I guess this time it got way too much spicy, which I was unable to handle and finally it collapsed…

In my last post, I had written a letter to someone which some of you might remember. It is no longer there as I removed it. So it all started with that someone. You know even today after so much time have passed after that “incident”, I feel that empty void in my heart that it created and I suddenly feel numb for a while. Tears roll out from my eyes and roll down my cheeks. I won’t share what actually happened or who that someone was. But I definitely want to share what this incident taught me, how it changed my life…

It is said that life is all about finding someone who can understand you in and out and where you don’t have to translate your soul, where words are spoken by eyes. Finding such people has become very difficult now a days, isn’t it ? But once you find them, we make them our life. Our small yet complete world revolve around these people. From my childhood, I am giving kind of person. I always helped anyone selflessly without expecting a single thing from them. It made me feel good. So, obviously, many of my friends used to take advantage of my behavior. But I cared least about it. Because I was not losing anything. Despite my mother telling me about this since school days, I never took it seriously. May be I never thought this quality of mine will backfire and hit me so hard. As I mentioned earlier, I found one such person in my life where it was all soul to soul connection, at least for me it was. What I couldn’t learn from my mother, this special person taught me the hard way. I thought that when people say something to you, they mean it (here again the deaf guy analogy came). But, the truth of life is something else.

“No, no. Not everyone is like you. Not everyone mean what they say. When someone say that you are very important to them. Don’t believe them. It’s a trap. Beware… There is great chance that they are just saying those cheesy things to get something from you. And believe me you will…and that’s it..they are gone…You are confused…you are still trying to understand what happened… you are figuring out…What can be the reason they left you?.. Was it you?… Self-doubt…You convince yourself that it was your mistake…you apologize and ask them stay… But they are like… Fu*k off… Now you are more confused… frustrated..Things are getting out of hand..you can’t lose this person by any chance…how could you? you have invested so much in them… And all those promises?..all those cheesy words?… They ought to mean something?… Right?…You try your best to convince that person to stay…You beg; you cry; you scream…You give up all your self respect and ego… why? Because you never imagined your life without them.. and now as they are not with you, you are completely lost… How could the person just leave?…this question never leaves your mind…and everything flashes in front of your eyes..every moment spent with them…And finally everything seems falling apart…But there’s nothing you can do here.. You know you are right but you lose in this battle… And for a person like me who is not used to failures, it becomes too much difficult to accept all of this. You think you will get better as time will pass, but it gets worse… But you need to stand up…right? You need to fight…You are a warrior… ” :- Life was telling me….

Before this incident, I was a forgive-forget kind of person. But, now, I have transformed myself into fight-revenge kind person aka WARRIOR. But before the final fight, I need to prepare myself and put myself through hard training and practice. That person scarred me for rest of my life. But I will use those scars to fight back…because war is won by destroying your enemies. Some day in future, there will come a moment, when that person will stand in front of you, but you will not shed a single drop of tear for them. Your aura will be so strong that now you don’t have to say anything; but your success will speak its language. The day is not too far… You will face many similar people in your life… Just remember.. if anyone disturbs your peace and self respect, just cut them off… Keep your fire alive… because there are some people who truly care for you and you need to hang out there for them and also for YOU.. 🙂


Who is REAL…Who is FAKE…

My summer vacations just ended and I am back to my college away from home. Last few months have been quite dynamic and I experienced a lot of things. My feelings and emotions saw it’s extreme levels on both sides. One day, I was feeling to be on top of the world and on another, I felt like crying alone sitting in a corner. These days were indeed a roller coaster ride for me I had never experienced earlier. I learnt new things; I met new people and also lost some. At the same time, I came to know some harsh realities of life which everyone of us have to face at least once in our life some or other day. And they struck me really hard and I found it very difficult to accept those.

 I am a very optimistic person. I always try to find some positive part in every negative thing. But this attitude of mine totally changed in these months. I am a pretty introvert in nature… People often think that we don’t like to make friends. So they usually tend to leave us alone. But let me tell u guys… We also like making new friends like you all. But we have a very small friend circle with limited no. of friends. Even they are very few, they are too much valuable for us. I had very few friends right from my childhood. I never could mix up with the crowd. In my school, I rarely struck a conversation with my classmates. But a huge transformation came in me in last two years. The one, who used to enjoy spending time alone, was now feeling alone and left out. He wanted to share his smallest thing with someone. He wanted someone to listen to his stories that were deep down in his mind from a long time. He too wanted to express his emotions and feeling. He wanted to dance like an idiot, cry like a baby, laugh loudly and enjoy everything. But who to tell? There was no one. He had no friends 🙂 He searched everywhere but couldn’t found the one. Finally, he lost all his hopes.

But God has something else planned for him. There is always a small ray of hope like that small plant, which grows in the cracks of cement walls.. Someone came in his life and everything changed. As time passed by, smaller conversations were replaced by endless late night talks. He found the one. He gave his everything to that person. He opened up and expressed all his feelings. Life was back on track. And again he was very happy. They promised each other to stay… But he had no idea what was going to happen next.. That person was not that person which he met 2 years ago. Everything was changed suddenly. But he still believed that everything’s gonna be fine.. But things worsened day by day and that day came which he had never expected ever. Heart break.. He tried all his best to make things better..But little by little, everything started slipping out of his hand. And it all ended with a heart break…

Sometimes we give up too much from our side but the other person never reciprocates. Sometimes we care too much. There is always an inside battle going within us between our heart and brain. And we don’t know what we should do.  It’s really confusing world. We don’t know…Who is REAL ?….and who is not? Who to trust and who to not? I don’t understand how people just forget what we do for them. It is really painful to see, isn’t it? Even the people who are very much close to you doesn’t get you sometimes. They have seen me through years and they don’t know a single thing about me… And what they say is that I didn’t tell them much…Aren’t some things need to be observed? So should I stop expecting from people? These questions made me angry and frustrated. But then I understood that this is the bitter truth of LIFE and I need to deal with it. I have to accept it. Now here am I….The one, who once thought he would have a lot of friends which he could share anything, is now all alone….back to his introverted behavior..Now he don’t think he could ever open up and develop trust on other people. Now he has developed a shield around his heart, which will stop him to share anything..LIFE again proved its dominance.. May be, there will be another sunrise waiting for him in near future which will bring that cheerfulness to his life. May be….



Note:- Before I actually get to the matter at hand, it’s my request to you guys to read my previous (1st) post on this site. Because it kinda deals with what this post is about, and (more importantly) who the hell am I.

If you have…. then we’ll do better to get going! 🙂

The premise of this post is a question of whether science or rather physical science can actually help us decide what’s good or bad in our lives. It’s an attempt to explain a vague, philosophical/psychiatric concept through some solid facts and principles.

The Pensieve


So, I’m back! So far it does seem that I’m sticking with my new year resolution. I’ve graduated from a post every two months to a post every two weeks! Yay!

A couple notices before we resume our business here..

1. To my brand new readers:- Welcome!

I do advise you to read my last post, Energy before you start reading this, because this starts off right where I left things last time and WITHOUT preamble. If you continue reading this without reading the one prior, you’ll be like….

(‘Where am I?…..’ )

2. To the old faithful:- Welcome back!

(Yeah, that’s it.)

Let’s start!


(Well if you guys really thought that I was gonna do a recap just so that you could simply laze around, then you were wrong! Just go through my previous post if you’ve forgotten it, won’t you?)

Now, assuming that you’ve…

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Hi everyone!

I’m pretty sure you must be wondering….

Who the hell am I?

So let me clear that first. I’m a guest/ co-writer who has received the privilege to post on this blog. Actually I have been on ‘the list’ since a month and it’s only today that I got off my lazy ass to finally publish something here. (A reblog at that….. So that should give you an idea about me.) So, before we begin I’d like to genuinely thank Prajwal for granting me this opportunity.

Now. About this post. Basically, this post is an attempt to explain some of the basics of human behavorial science and some ancient philosophical concepts through the principles of physical chemistry, especially thermodynamics and chemical kinetics. It’s based on a simple idea….. If the laws of Thermodynamics are indeed universal then don’t you think they would also apply to us, as an individual in this vast ocean of the globe?

You might be confused right now, but come aboard and I’m pretty sure you won’t be disappointed. (Note:- You might get bored though…)

Cheers! 🙂

The Pensieve


First of all I would like to wish all my readers a Happy New Year! Hopefully, we’ll be meeting more frequently, seeing that one of my several new year resolutions this year is to be more regular in my writings. Don’t get your hopes too high though, since like every New year resolution the probability of failure is very high.

Speaking about this article, I’m pretty sure the excerpt scared you. Don’t worry! I’m not taking a chemistry lecture here!

Relieved?… Me too! ‘Cuz I’m no chemist or physicist! We all know what I specialise in, right?… Rambling my own thoughts!

What I’m going to do is that I’m gonna take a page (a literal page, yes) out of our old, dusty Physical science textbooks and use it as a backdrop, so you’ll have to bear with it just… you know… Here and there…

To begin with, following are…

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SCHOOL, my second HOME…..

  Summer vacations are about to end.. Monsoon has already taken control of the weather… We are just about to reach the half mark to yet another year. 4 years have passed by since I left my school. Yet again, as the date of 26th of June starts approaching, the sound of school bell begins to fill my ears and mind. After enjoying summer holidays of nearly two months, it was finally the time when we put our school bags on and start with yet another year, full of learning, enjoyment and awesomeness. After completing two years at college, I really miss that feeling of the first day at school. New classroom, new teachers, new faces… And most of all, NEW BOOKS 🙂 The smell of newly bought books… There are so much things which we experience only in school and never afterwards… From our first friend, first fight to our first crush…so much feelings.

It is indeed ironic that we spend our SCHOOL DAYS yearning to graduate and our remaining days waxing nostalgic about our school days.

  I was in the same school from class 1 to class 10. So it had became my second home. Everything was familiar to me. It was like I had felt every part of that school. I knew every gap and corner. The teachers had became my family. All of them had taught me, so they all knew me personally. Unfortunately, there are very few memories that I remember now from my school days. But the ones I remember still makes me nostalgic. I was not able to crack the entrance exam for class 1, as I was very sick then. But, as my brother was also studying in the same school, I was given a chance on one condition that I stay in top 5 ranks in the exams, which by the way, I maintained till my last exam of class 10.. 🙂  I was a pretty studious kid back then. According to my teachers, I rarely talked to anyone. I still laugh at myself on how big nerd I was then. I don’t have much memories till my primary level i.e class 7 as I was the same nerd till then. It’s in the last 3 years of my school, I made a lot of memories; I opened up and I actually started enjoying school. I don’t know  how this huge transformation came in my behavior. May be because, I saw my future career already written as my brother had gotten admission into the best Engineering college of India. And now that, I would follow the same path. May be I understood that I had only these 3 years to enjoy to my fullest. So why to wait, let’s dive into those memorable 3 years of my life… 🙂


  It was very much difficult for me to open up. I made a few close friends and I used to talk to them only. Slowly, I increased my friend circle. And now everyone was my friend and it was more like a family. I rarely talked to girls of my class. And the one to those I talked was because my sister was also in my class. Otherwise, I was too shy, rather a Nerd… But as days passed by I got more involved in classroom activities. I realized that I had missed all this fun for last 7 years and felt bad… There was so much fun going in the class.. Right from gossiping about who were the couples of the class to making fun of teachers… I had missed all.. It was like my eyes and ears were all time closed for such things… Haha.. But now, along with studies, I also took interest in such activities.. I played a lot on ground during recess time.. Like a really lot…till all my clothes were all dirty.. Some of my friends really helped me to open up and talk… I was now living a LIFE.. I never had a crush on anyone till then.. Obviously because I never interacted with any girl.. Unfortunately, once our teacher made all the boys to sit along side of boys.. That was the first time I talked to any girl and I became friends with my bench partner.. And not to tell I had a small crush on her.. I never told that to anyone until now… There are many such memories like this which if I listed down now will make this post too long.. 🙂

Some days I wish I could go back in Life. Not to change anything, but to FEEL a few things twice.

  I know you all must have related to all of this and you also agree that School days are the best, aren’t they ? It is a place of all our FIRSTS. I didn’t felt so much on my last day of school that I feel now. Things have so much changed. Teachers who used to care about each and everyone in the class are replaced by those cold hearted professors who only teach for money. Grades have become so much important. A small failure even means a lot now. Students are committing suicides… There are too many pressures to handle, too many expectations to cope up with. And we have to live with this.. But what I say, let us take a moment out of our busy Life and remember our childhood days, our school days when we were so much happy and joyful. And let us accept the fact that those days are gone.. But those thousands of memories, they are always with us, they are immortal.. So why not use them in the best way possible ? Please feel free to share your golden memories of your school days… Let emotions flow…

Dread it. Run from it. Destiny still arrives…

Image result for infinity war

In time you will know what it’s like to lose. To feel so desperately that you’re right, yet to fail all the same. Dread it. Run from it. Destiny still arrives. 

These lines from Avengers: Infinity War, still shivers my whole body. Though spoken from the mouth of an EVIL, they are so deep and true, aren’t they ? They truly portray the MEANING OF LIFE.

DESTINY… What is destiny ? Is there something like destiny in reality ? Is our future already decided….? These questions have always made all of us curious from ancient times. Let us throw some light on our past.. As I belong to India and I follow Hinduism, I would like to give some references using my cultural heritage.

Destiny, as per Hinduism is best explained in the sacred BHAGAVAD GITA… the doctrine given to mankind by Lord Krishna in the battle of Mahabharata ! The meaning of destiny as detailed in BHAGAVAD GITA… fruits of KARMA that became available to one every second of life! The crux of destiny lay in karma performed… as we sow so shall we reap… nothing less or more ! Establishing absolute control over manifesting karma in present life is what destiny is all about. What Lord Krishna said thousands of years ago, Newton proposed the same in this third LAW OF MOTION: Every action has an equal and opposite reaction. Karma explained in scientific terms…. 🙂

Now we know that our destiny is decided by our Karma. But, the question to ponder now is that is our DESTINY already decided by someone before we are born ?? Are we just some characters performing our role in this cosmic movie of LIFE ? Does our present have something to do with our past lives ? We, Hindus, believe in the concept of REBIRTH. God keeps track of our KARMA and after our death, HE decides our next LIFE… But if this is the case that my present life has been decided on my past life KARMA, doesn’t it mean all the things that I do now is already written somewhere ? If this is true, why should I put any efforts as my future is already decided ?

Now lets try and understand the concept of Fate, Destiny and Freewill. Somebody has rightly said “Fate is what you are given, Destiny is what you make of it”. You may call God has decided your Fate but ultimately its you and your past Karma’s which decide your Fate. You may not have control on your Past Karma’s and their results but God has given you the power to take charge of your current Karma’s which will decide your future lives. Another way of looking at is that due to past life Karma’s, though God may have decided your starting point of this life (your family, its status, your immediate environment on which you have no control) and the final destiny of your current life, however he has given you the choice to choose the path in this journey. There can always be more than one path to a destination. You can choose the path which is less bumpy, which has beautiful surroundings, lots of greenery, rivers in between. Basically this is the path of good Karma’s and this is Freewill on which you have control. Here I would like to quote the lines of Lord Krishna from the Bhagwad Gita :

कर्मणि एव अधिकार: ते |मा फलेषु कदाचन ||

मा कर्म फल हेतुर्भु: |मा ते संगोस्तु अकर्मणि ||

Thus there are four commandments which means:-
You have right to action. You do not have right to outcome.(therefore) don’t act to rightfully claim desired outcome. (and also) do not resort to inaction.

So we know that our final outcome of Life is already decided and even we could know our future, we cannot change it. That is going to happen anyways. For a moment, let’s forget what is written in the sacred texts. Let us look at our LIFE. We face similar kind of situations every day where even when we want something to happen, it doesn’t. Let us look through our past and our sufferings. If we hadn’t faced those, were we be the same as we are today in present ? It is rightly said: ” Man proposes, God disposes.”

Image result for one often meets his destiny

So as Master Oogway told, let us forget about what our FATE will be and what is written in the book of our LIFE. Let us live in the PRESENT. There is a saying:-

Yesterday is History, Tomorrow is a Mystery, but Today is a GIFT….That is why it is called the PRESENT…

Hope you like my post. I am eager to listen you views on the same. See u soon… 🙂

TO the ONE I miss….

To my beloved SISTER and a Friend….

   It was very nice to see you after such a long time. Do you believe that we had met after almost a year ? There was once a time we used to meet everyday in school. And now… time has parted us apart. Things have changed.. We both are in our 20s now. I don’t know if I have changed or if you have, but your place in my LIFE has been always SPECIAL and always will be.

   You always wanted to become a doctor… From the day our 10th class results were out, I knew.. I always knew.. But I tried convincing you to join engineering.. not because I wanted you to pursue it but I never wanted us apart for those two important years of my life. You were physically weak and I knew that it would be difficult for you to cope up with medical studies. But you proved me wrong.. And I am the happiest person for my defeat. Even though you had severe migraine problem, you fought it bravely and followed your passion… You lost a year due to this problem.. But you put yourself together and achieved your goal.. I heard about your admission in one of the best colleges in Pune. I was very happy that you got a college away from home. Even though you could have gotten the one near Home, but I think what happened, happened for the best. You needed that exposure to overcome your physical weakness. You have completed one year of your college now. And as I expected earlier, you were excelling there. At the same time, you were getting rid of migraine. What could have been better?

    It is said that we never value about a thing until we don’t have it anymore. I never realized your importance in my life till 10th class. Because I have missed you so much these 4 years. I remember you were admitted in a different school in 1st class but you joined the same school in which I was admitted. I remember each and every memory which you were a part of. Because you were the only person in that class of 50 students who knew me, who understood me, who cared about me. You always had a watch on me so that I should not do anything wrong. I never told about school at home but you were the one who made sure everything reached my parents. Frankly speaking, I never liked that thing about you…haha.. 🙂 But I realized its value later. You always wanted me on the right path. Remember those times when my notebooks were stolen just before my exams ? You were the one who dictated me each and every answer on phone ensuring I did my best not caring about your preparation. I know we didn’t talk much in class but honestly I always felt a support because of your presence.

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