My summer vacations just ended and I am back to my college away from home. Last few months have been quite dynamic and I experienced a lot of things. My feelings and emotions saw it’s extreme levels on both sides. One day, I was feeling to be on top of the world and on another, I felt like crying alone sitting in a corner. These days were indeed a roller coaster ride for me I had never experienced earlier. I learnt new things; I met new people and also lost some. At the same time, I came to know some harsh realities of life which everyone of us have to face at least once in our life some or other day. And they struck me really hard and I found it very difficult to accept those.
I am a very optimistic person. I always try to find some positive part in every negative thing. But this attitude of mine totally changed in these months. I am a pretty introvert in nature… People often think that we don’t like to make friends. So they usually tend to leave us alone. But let me tell u guys… We also like making new friends like you all. But we have a very small friend circle with limited no. of friends. Even they are very few, they are too much valuable for us. I had very few friends right from my childhood. I never could mix up with the crowd. In my school, I rarely struck a conversation with my classmates. But a huge transformation came in me in last two years. The one, who used to enjoy spending time alone, was now feeling alone and left out. He wanted to share his smallest thing with someone. He wanted someone to listen to his stories that were deep down in his mind from a long time. He too wanted to express his emotions and feeling. He wanted to dance like an idiot, cry like a baby, laugh loudly and enjoy everything. But who to tell? There was no one. He had no friends 🙂 He searched everywhere but couldn’t found the one. Finally, he lost all his hopes.
But God has something else planned for him. There is always a small ray of hope like that small plant, which grows in the cracks of cement walls.. Someone came in his life and everything changed. As time passed by, smaller conversations were replaced by endless late night talks. He found the one. He gave his everything to that person. He opened up and expressed all his feelings. Life was back on track. And again he was very happy. They promised each other to stay… But he had no idea what was going to happen next.. That person was not that person which he met 2 years ago. Everything was changed suddenly. But he still believed that everything’s gonna be fine.. But things worsened day by day and that day came which he had never expected ever. Heart break.. He tried all his best to make things better..But little by little, everything started slipping out of his hand. And it all ended with a heart break…
Sometimes we give up too much from our side but the other person never reciprocates. Sometimes we care too much. There is always an inside battle going within us between our heart and brain. And we don’t know what we should do. It’s really confusing world. We don’t know…Who is REAL ?….and who is not? Who to trust and who to not? I don’t understand how people just forget what we do for them. It is really painful to see, isn’t it? Even the people who are very much close to you doesn’t get you sometimes. They have seen me through years and they don’t know a single thing about me… And what they say is that I didn’t tell them much…Aren’t some things need to be observed? So should I stop expecting from people? These questions made me angry and frustrated. But then I understood that this is the bitter truth of LIFE and I need to deal with it. I have to accept it. Now here am I….The one, who once thought he would have a lot of friends which he could share anything, is now all alone….back to his introverted behavior..Now he don’t think he could ever open up and develop trust on other people. Now he has developed a shield around his heart, which will stop him to share anything..LIFE again proved its dominance.. May be, there will be another sunrise waiting for him in near future which will bring that cheerfulness to his life. May be….